Once you've hit rock-bottom, there's nowhere else to go but up

It's like I've finally used up all the oceans of internal disappointment that I had seething in me within the space of the last quarter, and now there really isn't much disappointment left to feel.

I will not be expecting anything much any more, all of the things that my big city upbringing had taught me to take for granted. Things will not get better; to expect them to is nothing but a lesson in futility.

So what's left? Resignation, I guess. Acknowledgement, the throwing of arms into the air. I give up. It may be time to slowly stop doing what people think I should, and start doing what I truly feel; to stop aiming for the stars, and instead start nurturing the tiny candle that flickers by my feet.

Perhaps then I will finally be able to find a small simple peace to call my own.

蔡健雅(Tanya Chua) - 拋物線(Parabola) Chinese to English translation

Much of the power of the Chinese language lies in its potential for truly mind-blowing lyricism; a language in which the meanings of words and phrases morph endlessly with placement and context. Which is why it can never be properly and fully translated.

I got to learn of this song through my sister. 拋物線 is an intensely moving song by Singaporean singer-songwriter Tanya Chua, the lyrics simultaneously simple and incredibly lyrical. I'm going to attempt an English translation, even though I suspect it will fall short.

我確實說　我這樣說　我不在乎結果

I had indeed said it, I had said it in this way - I do not care about the ending

我對你說　我有把握　成功例子好多

I had told you - I am confident of this, there are so many success stories

人們虛假又造作　總愛得不溫不火

Humans are hypocritical and pretentious beings - They always love with moderation

我們用真心就不會有差錯

But as long as we are sincere, there will be no mistakes

我沒想過我會難過　你竟然離開我

I had never thought that I would be sad- And then you left me.

Chorus

*愛沿著　拋物線

Love follows its trajectory

離幸福　總降落得差一點

Always falling a little short of happiness

流著血 心跳卻不曾被心痛削減

Blood flows, but heartbeats have never been stopped by the heartache

真真切切

In honesty and truthfulness

青春的　拋物線

The trajectory of youth

把未來　始於相遇的地點

Extrapolates the starting point and thus predicts the future

至高後才了解

Only upon reaching a certain height will you understand

世上月圓月缺只是錯覺*

The moon's waxing and waning, as seen from the earth, is nothing but an illusion.

我好想說　我只想說　我不要這後果

I really wanted to say, I only want to say - I don't want this kind of ending

可是你說　相對來說　走開是種解脫

But you said, on the contrary you said - Leaving is a kind of relief

當初親密的動作　變成當下的閃躲

When intimate gestures turn into the avoidance that happens now

感情的過程出了什麼錯

At which point in the progress of this relationship did things go awry?

我沒想過我會難過　你終於離開我

I never thought I would be this sad - when you finally left me.

至高後才了解

Only upon reaching a certain height will you understand

世上月圓月缺只是錯覺

The moon's waxing and waning, as seen from the earth, is nothing but an illusion.

Separation

Your absence has gone through me

Like thread through a needle.

Everything I do is stitched in its colour.

~~W.S. Merwin